update: homage to lumber

apparently the mall described in "mallibu" below is called the malibu lumber yard, in homage to its previous life as, well, an actual lumber yard. now, the lumber yard does not boast lumber as its name might suggest, but rather peddles $300 dresses to starlets who have retired from The Hills.

citatinon:

• Lauren Conrad, modeling clothes for boyfriend Kyle Howard during a shopping trip at the Alice + Olivia store at the Malibu Lumber Yard. The Hills star seemed super-comfortable in front of her boyfriend, who sat on the couch enjoying her fashion show. The couple also snapped photos of children's dresses before leaving the store. "The two looked like they were in were in love, sneaking kisses here and there," an onlooker tells us. (via people.com)

mall-ibu

today i met an old friend in malibu to have lunch and go to the beach. she was in town from san francisco and wanted a good old fashioned relaxing malibu sunday.

i grew up "next to" malibu and so feel some sort of nostalgic connection to the place, but not half as much so as my friend. her parents had a beach house there about twenty years ago and so she spent summers playing at the beach and eating pancakes at the pancake houses, which were, apparently, numerous.

now that i live on the eastside of LA (and have no money), i dont go to malibu a lot anymore. on the drive north, i was surprised to see new restaurants along PCH, many many many "for rent" signs, and "the annenberg community beach house." (still have no idea what it is. will google later).

when i came upon the little old country mart, which, lets be honest, has not been in the country for some time, i was stunned. there was a straight up MALL next to the country mart. now for those of you unfamiliar with this tiny gem of a seaside town, the malibu country mart was the only little shopping center in that strip of the malibu coastline. it started (relatively) simple with food vendors who sold beach lunches to go, then escalated to starbucks, beauty supply, movie theater, ben and jerrys. in high school i recall it was very quiet on weeknights when we would see movies there. although i did see brian grazer watching seabiscuit next to me.

the country mart was the hub, but it was still relatively small, independent shops, and a country flavor. no longer my friends.

next to the country mart is a SECOND "mart" which bears no name but bears great resemblance to our other LA monuments to commerce, the grove, the americana, the commons. though i doubt this center is carusos doing (will google after), it reeks of the new mall. large james perse store with LOUNGE CHAIRS on a PATIO in front, a crumbs (of beverly hills i might add) bakery for your mandatory cupcake, tory burch, intermix, theory, and something that was called "j. crew beach." - which was slightly terrifying.

a mall. an honest to goodness mall (with luxury goods) smack in the center of PCH. a town which was once considered "far" from LA can now be considered beverly hills north, a satellite station of shops. meanwhile malibu residents complain they cant buy nails, or underwear, but there are plenty of $80 t shirts to go around now.

ah, my youth is so far in the past now that i am recalling "the good old days" of malibu, when pretension was implied, not printed on your ed hardy t shirt. the place was crawling with families, tourists, visitors of all kinds. folks, imagine your local strip mall with a starbucks and beauty supply filled with tourists. kind of strange isnt it.

there was a magician in the center of the new mall, and children were seated within a large wooden oval, which eerily recalled richard serra's engulfing sculptures, while their parents looked on from expensive yard furniture tastefully arranged as you would arrange lounge chairs around a pool. this is america's back yard, ladies and gentleman, and if you have a car and an hour, you too can have a piece of malibu. no entrance fee.

kraft work

saw jimmy kimmel at the unique los angeles craft fair today. he was very plain looking, not at all the goofy, chubby jimmy i know from TV, and was with a new girlfriend who was NOT sarah silverman. i could tell she dragged him there as he did not seem excited in the least to be faced with thousands of booths of artisanal jewelry et al. he was wearing a plaid collared shirt a la uniqlo collection by opening ceremony.

also, the gal working the parking validation table was what's her face from wet hot american summer. katie. the one who switched sweaters with michael showalter, only to switch back immediately. i didn't recognize her at first, her hair was shorter and she looked older. but i asked her "do i know you from somewhere?" to which she replied, "nope." classy response. if i were here i would have said the same. upon walking away, my sister turned to me and i replied "wet. hot. american. summer." one of the greatest films of all time.

thank you Unique LA craft fair for 2 excellent up close and personal celeb moments.

sorry, cat people

I don't want to hate cats.

I don't want to hate anything, or anyone, in fact. But it seems that cats hate me, and effectively poison my body, so I (understandably) have a contentious relationship with the creatures.

I went to stay at a dear friend's house for a few days and did not realize she had two cats. Once I stepped in the door, it was too late. My body was already under attack.

When I say cats hate me, I don't really believe they think too long and hard about it. Perhaps I'm just referring to the boundaries, or lack of boundaries, they feel in regards to my presence. Perhaps its because they can sense I am terribly allergic to their dander, and so they naturally feel a strong urge to lie on the pillow where I'll later be sleeping.

I didn't used to understand when people said they were "cat people" or "dog people" but I can tell you one thing, I am NOT a "cat person."

At least with my dog, if I tell him to leave, he leaves. He doesn't want to piss me off. Not that I'm scary or violent, I'm just "the human" and "the human" is in charge. With these cats, I tell them to leave and they walk toward me defiantly. They walk past me to go into the room I am trying to keep them out of. And since I cannot really pick them up to take them out (cat dander ALL over the body, face, hands), I'm stuck in this insane cartoon scenario of stomping around, chasing a cat around a room until I manage to herd it out the door again. Luckily they haven't figured out how to open the doors. Yet.

I don't want to be a species-ist but I really cannot figure them out. I understand why "cat people" like them, if you want a pet that doesn't really care what you think about it, doesn't really need you (except to feed it) and doesn't really listen to you, then I guess cats are the way to go.

But as for me, I'm taking my Benadryl and proclaiming myself a "dog person."

my new bff

Growing up, I always wanted a dog. Probably because most of my friends had them, my favorite TV families had them, and it just seemed normal, and American, to have a pooch in the house.

My Dad is very clean. Not just clean, I might say more Danny Tanner-ish in his habits. As in, he hoses down the backyard, and front walkway, and even gets halfway down the street, just for fun, until we have to yell "Dad, you're wasting water! You can't hose down the world!" Then he stops, and comes inside, and starts the very important task of scrubbing the fingerprint smudges off the walls.

So, no dog. When I was eight, we moved across town to a larger house, with a pool, in a "safer" neighborhood, in a gated community. With a large yard. I was very against moving. Why, I cried, were we picking up and deserting everything and everyone we knew and loved?! Our old house was great, we had an avocado tree, it was on a super steep hill, what more could you want?! Well, in order to calm me down, I guess, my parents told me that we could get a dog when we moved to the new, barren home. I was sold. I quickly shut my trap.

I feel it was serendipitous that we didn't get a dog after the move. My parents said that I would never walk it, which I vehemently denied, but which was probably true. And saying we would get a dog and not following through was pretty much the ONLY thing my parents ever promised that didn't happen in my life so far. I guilted them about it for a few years, sobbing on holidays when I said "the only thing I want is a dog" and refused presents. Then snuck them into my room on the sly.

I am in my twenties now, and our new roommate just moved in. She has a dog. A West Highland Terrier, or Westie, as they are known. He is fluffy, but not too fluffy, small, but not too small, white, but not too white. He is perfect.

I don't even believe in perfection really, but this dog is perfect for ME. Its the dog I always dreamt of having, and it loves me as I knew a dog would. It follows me into the bathroom when I shower. At first we would scare each other, I was not used to having a non-human, living thing with a beating heart following me around and it would surprise me around corners.

Slowly, we got used to each other. Now I can tell when the dog needs to go out, or when he just sees a few birds in our yard. I give the doggie water, I walk him, and I teach him boundaries. My boyfriend was impressed when I taught him how to lie in his bed while the humans are eating, so as not to bother us. "I can't believe he listens to you." As Cesar Millan would say, I am the Alpha Dog.

In some ways, I am glad I have -been forced to- wait until this age to have a dog around. I don't take him for granted. I am happy every morning when I wake up and hear his little nails clicking across the floor. We are a good match. I can see how a dog is not for everyone. They are very needy and require a lot of attention and affection and structure.

Now my parents are semi-retired but my Dad travels a lot for work. He's off to Luxembourg, Mexico, or the Turks and Caicos every month. I ask my Mom if she would like a dog to keep her company. She says no, she has a stepdog now (ours) and she can visit it whenever she wants.

And yes, my furry friend will go with me wherever I want to go and whenever, he is very acommodating like that.